Thursday, November 8, 2012

This joke is so bad it's good... I know it's offensive but I couldn't resist reposting it, so forgive me. My son was 'read' a shidduch from The Five Towns, but he doesn't want to go out with someone from a broken home. OUCH!!!
NOREASTER JOKES: Mayor Bloomberg decided not to send the salt trucks to SeaGate. He doesn't want to pour salt on their wounds...
Seen on Nachum Segal's Facebook wall on Sunday: Is there gas available in Williamsburg? Reply: Of course - there's plenty of chulent.
Overheard on Facebook on Motzei Shabbos: Anyone need gas? My husband seems to have plenty...
Husband: Ugh, I'm gassy. Wife: That explains the gas shortage! You've been hoarding!
Courtesy of Mordechai Schmutter: Help! I told the guys in shul I was feelng gassy, and now i have a long line of cars and people with jerry cans behind me!
Time for some post Sandy jokes, don't you think? Here goes: 1985 Buick station wagon for sale. On its last legs. Has full tank of gas.

Monday, October 29, 2012

You know the chocolate you keep stashed away for a rainy day? Time to break it out now... It won't get much rainier than this...
My friend's 3 year old said: "We didn't have cheider today because outside there's a Honeycake!"
How do we know that Sandy is a Shvigger? She can blooz for days, causes damage and moves on, and hundreds of jokes were composed at her expense...
How do we know Sandy is a woman? She takes her time showing up, is unpredictable, and she sure knows how to stir up a storm!...
Sandy has canceled her visit due to the bad weather....
Sandy is having a hard time arriving, thanks to the MTA shutdown....
For instructions on how to build an Ark, refer to Parshas Noach.
Yesterday in shul a man was seen taking a bunch of Dvar Yoim Byoimoi leaflets in case it doesn't come out today (incidentally is it is out...)
Sandy is in active labor, we're expecting her water to break any minute...
I just saw someone chasing his hat... Does that mean I can start drinking from my bottles of Spring Water???
As I suspected, Sandy is a cleaning lady... they never show up as promised!!!
New signs sprang up in New Square reminding Sandy to walk on the "Ladies Only" side of the street...
Overheard at home: Mommy, when can we have something from the Hurricane Order???
Sandy for President! She did more for the local economy in one day than Obama and Romney ever can....
SPECIAL SALE: E-z Fast Tablets - the groceries ran out of food!